Nothing says ‘train wreck’ more than a single female about to go on a date.
The wardrobe changes. Make-up changes. Crying. Why? Because those are physical representations of the war going on in my head. I love the comedies that have a good Angel and a bad angel on a person’s shoulders. It’s a fairly decent representation. When you have anxiety, you have 10x the ‘angels’ on your shoulder. Really it is all the criticisms that you have received in your life that stay on repeat.
“You look like a hooker” “You will never be happy” “You deserve what you get” “You are too fat” “You are too old to be dating again, what are you thinking?!” “You are the parent, how can you give your daughter relationship advice when you don’t even know what the hell you are doing?” “You deserve to be alone” “You are way too weird to be dating” “You only get one soulmate in your life” “You suck at love”
Yay Anxiety!!
So, I have changed clothes 4x. I have redone my makeup 4x. Cried 2x. Taken a nap to avoid being too tired.
Made mental notes about what not to talk about:
1) Don’t talk about your ex.
2) Don’t talk about your love of office supplies i.e. Colored pens, post its, file folders, and fancy paper clips.
3) He hasn’t been married or had kids so that’s out.
4) Don’t talk about the hell that has been this last year.
Great. So that leaves laundry, the weather, and sports.
It’s fine, it’s fine, it’s gonna be fine!
