Muscle memory caught by a 13 year old.
I took my daughter to see a Christmas Light Lighting on the downtown square tonight. It was a beautiful sunset….
Without thinking, I reached my hand out to hold his hand, only his hand wasn’t there. I jumped slightly realizing what I had done and shoved my hand in my jacket pocket.
My daughter caught me. She put her arm around me and said “It’s ok mom.”
I turned my head away so she couldn’t see the hot tears rolling down my face. I hate that I miss him so much. I hate that he meant more to me than I did to him. I hate that I was such a stupid fool. I hate that both girls can see that I am heartbroken.
It doesn’t matter how much you love someone. If they don’t love you back, you don’t have anything.