The meeting of the souls

•May 17, 2020 • Leave a Comment

It is rare for two souls to meet in with no walls up.

It is rare for two people to stop in a busy time in their lives and just be.

When that happens to you, hold onto it.

You have just been fully recognized by another soul. No acting. No bullshit.

Your flaws have been seen in that moment, but they accounted for nothing. You were taken as you are……a recognition of safety. Respect. Honor.

Sometimes, being seen and accepted for who you are and nothing else, is the sincerest compliment.

Its ok to admit that you feel something for someone. But it is even better for that admission to be respected and validated.

Even though it isn’t required.

Everyone wants to be desired.

Everyone wants to be seen and accepted at a soul level.

“You’re a lot”

•April 18, 2020 • Leave a Comment

What the hell does that mean??? I hear it so many times and I don’t know what that means.

You’re a lot.

A lot of what? Hot air? Emotions? Hyper? Overwhelming? Dramatic? Fatass?

What do I do that triggers another person to send up red flares of “She’s a lot- RUN”??

Its a real question. Yeah the answer will prob hurt my feelings but hell, being in a situation where I hear that, is not enjoyable either.

Do I stare into their soul too hard? Possibly, I could see that. I try not to do that, it freaks people out. Maybe thats what it is……maybe they end up feeling exposed when I am around.

Either way, I hate that phrase “You’re a lot”.

The world stopped.

•April 5, 2020 • Leave a Comment

It one thing to be a part of a historical event. The Challenger explosion, 9/11, Kennedy being shot. COVID-19 is different. It stopped the entire world. All civilizations, all cultures, all histories stopped.

A super virus. A virus that doesn’t discriminate with age, health, status, geographic area, race, or sex.

This isn’t a historical event. This is a humanity changing event.

Another one bites the dust.

•March 30, 2020 • Leave a Comment

It took this one longer bail than the last one but the dust trail is still quite evident.

Believe me, I don’t relish being ‘too much’ to handle. I would much rather stick a fork in a toaster, honestly. I try not to open my mouth and let words out but sometimes it just happens.

I have opinions. I have a colorful past that tends to reach out and drag me down every now and then. And I am passionate to a fault. A huge fault. I can’t help it.

c’est le vive

And they’re pierced

•March 15, 2020 • Leave a Comment

Yep. I turned 40 this year.

The existential crisis of who I am and what I want out of life has begun.

My oldest daughter received a promise ring from her boyfriend this weekend. A bid deal.

She graduates from Highschool this year. Her sister is with her dad and that leaves me here. Trying to navigate what this next phase of my life is supposed to be.

I don’t know what to do. I know that I hate my job. I am lonely AF.

So yeah, I got my tits pierced…….. not the craziest thing I have ever done. Figured why the hell not? I have always wanted to do it. Just never got around to it.

Here’s to 2020!

Leap of faith.

•March 11, 2020 • Leave a Comment

When is a ‘leap of faith’ an act of desperation?

When is the pursuit of a relationship one sided?

When is the point where being with a person is worth moving for?

When is it ok to say ‘Yeah, time with you is worth changing my life over’?

When is it ok to be happy again? When is it ok to think that I can have love again?

When is it ok????

N.R.Hart

•March 8, 2020 • Leave a Comment